Weekend Update

Wednesday

Drove to the cottage with Mike and Jo. That might have been the best part of the whole weekend! Just talking about music, cracking jokes, making fun of the Tim Hortons employees, just anticipating a good weekend. Anticipation is always better then the experience

Got in at around midnight, everyone was already gassed, which is so funny. When you're sober drunk people seem so stupid, but whatever. Unpacked my tent, looked inside and realized that my mother (who had used it last) didn't pack the tent rods in it when she packed it up again. Sooo 10 minutes in I've lost the only semblance of privacy. The introvert has nowhere to hide away, that's going to go well.

I think the usual cast of characters was there. The guy who always brings a new girl to the cottage so we don't bother to get to know her because she will be replaced, the couples, the flamboyant drunk.. you know, the usual

So we just drank and played some cards, made a fire and chilled around it for the night, nothing special

Thursday

Got up at like 10am. Fuck nothing really happened, I don't really remember. Ummm my buddy got an air gun for his birthday so we were shooting the air guns at targets which was fun. Then we decided, hey lets go hunt some animals. Don't worry we didn't hit anything.

We drank straight through Thursday and worked through the first keg. and we were like oh shit there's only 1 more keg left, which is unbelievable like 12 kids over 2 nights drank an entire keg.

Oh I almost forgot my buddy Rob got belligerent at like 9pm, and when a girl wouldn't do a keg stand proceeded to scream "Why don't you man up you fucking bitch!!" and we were like ohh my shit dude take it easy, and we were all cracking up laughing and he was stumbling around. then proceeded to hurl in the woods while we were all on the floor laughing.

After that he went in his tent and passed out. We then opened the tent and lifted him by his air mattress, and put him outside on the table. We then proceeded to throw eggs at him while he slept and he didn't even flinch. We went to bed with him still outside on the table

Friday

We wanted to watch the world cup game so we went into the bar in the city. Bar was closed until 11am and the game started at 10. So we drove to another town to find the bar. On the way Rob's muffler fell off and was dragging on the ground and I heard it in the back. After 30 mins of repair we were off again, checking bars until 11 when all of them opened and we grabbed breakfast and watched the Oranje kick ass!! I got in a big argument with a buddy about the red card. I was getting really pissed but thats just my competitiveness

Also, I may or may not have killed a squirrel. I may or may not have been playing with a gun, and a squirrel may or may not have ran in front of my shot. I may or may not have felt awful and buried him. Yea... it was messed. Wait, may or may not have been messed.

Friday night ended up being really fucked up. So some 17 year old kids came by. Apparently these kids are part of the baddest family in the town, whom everyone is afraid to mess with. They wanted to start drinking with us and us like adult mid 25 year olds, start challenging them to drinking competitions.

They were 1 short on players so I said I would join their team. So then the 17 year olds won! and wow my friends were piiiissed. But I was like we are not big drinkers though we think we are why would we challenge them? Man we suck. So then my buddy starts chirping me, and I get the 17 year olds to start chirping him with me, which pisses him off.

Then we decide to challenge through arm wrestles. A friggin 17 year old 240lb kid beat the hell out of me in arm wrestling. I honestly didn't think I would lose. Then a 17 year old wrestles my buddy and kicks his ass! It was messed (but more on that later)

In the end the 17 year olds got in a fight with a chick in our group and she was all pissed and so we told them to go home and everyone was all pissy, like dogs licking their wounds

Saturday

Saturday was beer olympics. Me Dave and Rob and other chick were on a team, and I though a really good team

Beer Pong - We won all 3 games easily and took first place on that. I'm a fucking fantastic beet pong player because I'm so tall I can see the trajectory. Also I cheat because my arms are so long I can stretch across the table. Also, when people chirp me I get really focused and always hit my shot. So when Adrienne before I threw yelled "my friend Kristina" I was pissed, hit my shot and just glared at her!

Flip Cup - I'm also really good a flip cup, but I don't like to play because I like feel the pressure when I don't flip properly so rather then enjoy the game I get nervous. I flipped perfectly all 3 times I played but didn't enjoy and we came in 3rd out of 4 teams

Tips - Ummm frisbee 1 person tips the thrown frisbee and the other catches. I'm a fucking athlete so I have good reflected and I'm flexible so I'm good at this game too. We didn't make it to the end but we got in a big fight because of cheating ect but pizza came half way through which pretty much ended the olympics

Soooooooo that night, after we had gone through 3 kegs we were downing beer and my buddy was all pissed. So I asked him and basically he was mad that I turned the 17 year olds on him, and that he was going through issues and I should have known not to piss him off and that as a group we pick on him blah blah blah I don't wanna get into it because its not really entertaining, but I had to try to put out that fire all night

The other thing that was messed up was these girls came down to see our party, now a couple things really pissed me off about this

1) If you come down to someone Else's party, and then tell them their party sucks, then why did you come in the first place, go the fuck home and sit in the dark if that's more fun

2) If you're a girl and you're super pissed at another girl, STOP BEING A PUSSY AND JUST GIVING DIRTY LOOKS. You think you're all fucking hard, get in a fight. Don't get all pissy and talk about kicking ass then stand on the sidelines with a mean look. God that makes me wanna punch you

3) If you come down to someone else's party and your presence is causing friction, either ease the friction or get the fuck out. Don't sit around making things worse..


So that ended Saturday night

Ride home was lame, stuck in traffic, I had to drive a part of it, I was tired as hell...

There goes another unspectacular cottage weekend. Honestly I think I'd rather spend it golfing.. alone... then again I am an introvert

One Love

Keep forgetting to update blog...

Hmmm what to say what to say... It's tough because there are things I want to say, but given this is a public blog people can still find me and I can still get in trouble.

Updates to my life? (also I'm using names based on tennis players for some reason)

- I've made a new friend, who already has had a big impact on my life. Her name is Serena and she's a Yoga instructor who has already challenged everything that I believe in and everything that I choose to be. It's very interesting as I am a very private person and she has been the only person to look at me and say: "why are you so introverted, what is the purpose of this, in the end what is it accomplishing". I've never been asked that. Most of the time all people care about is getting information out of me, rather then ask why I hold information back in general

She's also constantly challenging me to try Yoga. Which I refuse to do since I spent an obscene amount of money on my golf membership. But, and again this is new, rather then try to tell me whatever its just money just spend it, she wants to show me some basic techniques I can do at home, rather then go the gym to do it. Just so different

- I talked to Justine last night. In case you're wondering she was my Australian fling. Mmmmm good times. But she's funny (and she has no idea) because she's absolute wife material, and it only took 2 meetings with her to figure it out. Its unbelieve how she can come from a private Catholic University in the States, being well versed in all notions of God, Jesus, spirituality and a strict moral compass, but at the same time going out and partying and drinking and oh God could she dance. And the way she looked at me with those beautiful green eyes as she kissed me... I don't think I could ever get that again. She's the type of girl you could bring home and introduce to your mom, but at the same time could drink you under the table.

Aaaanyways, she's doing well and we got to catch up a little on things. She's gonna be successful. Very successful. I have a feeling you're going to hear about her in the next few years.

- Cottage this weekend. More stories to come. More confusion, shame and maybe a little bit of fun? Maybe?

- All my big jobs are done, nobody is expecting anything from me. Shaping up to be a pretty decent summer!

Next time... Maybe I will tell the Justine story...

World cup

In light of the start of the World Cup I figured I would list all the reasons I love the world cup, while at the same time list reasons I hate Toronto FC.

I love the world cup because The top players play, simple as that. Nobody could possibly refuse an invitation to their club team, and they play with a passion for their country, it really means something to them. It reminds me of when I would play hockey against these American powerhouse teams who would recruit American players from all over the States to face us. and it was a national pride thing for us. We hated them, we couldn't lose to them. That x1,000,000,000 is the world cup... pretty cool

I hate TFC because The worst players play, simple as that. TFC is considered "major league" soccer but my God if you've been playing soccer for your whole life, and you're THAT bad, you should give up. and in Toronto, the sheeple think their players are soooooo good, and that pisses me off because it's insulting to good soccer players

I love the world cup because The brand of soccer is just beautiful to watch. The different styles, from Portugal's stylistic attacking style, to Brasil's new gritty counterattack win style, to Italy's defence and through-ball style the essence of good sport is multiple strategies played out against each other. It's like war but nobody dies.

I hate TFC because The brand of soccer is like watching a group of temporarily blind (because if they were really blind they could follow the ball with its sound) 1 lunged, 1 leged asylum patients play soccer. Its like a circus of nothingness with no organization, no skill and mediocre heart try to play a game you play with all your heart and soul.

I love the world cup because Everybody gets into it. People who don't know shit about soccer and normally call it boring give it a chance and embrace the soccer community. Its beautiful to watch. Sure its a tad annoying that people claim to be soccer fans for 1 month every 4 years but the atmosphere is worth it because basically they admit it

I hate TFC because Douchebag sheeple in Toronto. Ok here's the thing. In Toronto we are always searching to be the hip European sort of city, all cultured and shit. We also want to be know as a "big team" city so we don't support The Toronto Marlies or the Mississauga Ice Dogs because its not Pro hockey. We don't support Inter-county baseball because its not pro baseball. We only support pro teams. But we support TFC because were all fucking idiots and we actually think TFC is a pro soccer team and MLS is a pro soccer league. It's not. Its amateur, but its insulting to amateur because amateur players make up for kill through effort, but MLS doesn't really do that. But we support it because it supports our fucking delusion that its a "major league" (its not) which plays "major league soccer" (it doesn't). Its rank amateurish soccer that we root and cheer for even though we claim were to big for amateur sports.


I love the world cup because Rivalries... Its one of the big reasons I love college football the rivalries are just so much fun. I can't wait to see USA vs England and if you could see Brasil vs Argentina or Spain vs Portugal its just fun, its exciting...

All in all I love world cup time. Its the beautiful summer for the beautiful game. Find a patio, get some friends together have a couple pints and enjoy the month!

One Love...

People that I hate

Sorry yet again I have not updated my blog. I have the time it's just not a habit right now.


So I figured I would list a bunch of people that I just can't stand and why:

Tim Tebow That fucking annoying bible thumping prick has gotten more attention for doing nothing then anybody else. He's never going to make it in the NFL but his jersey sales lead the league. Also, he's fighting with my mancrush (Brady Quinn) for starting QB on the team so I hope he gets owned and fades off to do holy water infomercials

Sarah Jessica Parker And yes it is totally because of sex and the city. But its got nothing to do with any qualms about womens sexual revolution, its about how people who look like horses don't have the right to be picky about their mate or their performance. Why yes I didn't give you enough foreplay, but the fact is you look like a horse and you don't see me bringing that up

Jimmy Fallon I don't care if I spent your name wrong, the fact is you only leave SNL when you are actually GOOD. You sucked, giant monkey balls for your whole stint on SNL, fuckin breaking character and laughing through entire skits, and you were never funny. So you parlay no talent and an unfunny SNL career into a bunch of just scary awful movies... Just note



Just look... Look at the cover photo of Taxi and tell me that's not the worst movie you've ever seen. Tell me... Look at him! To b honest I've actually seen it (On a plane. I did not.. repeat DID NOT pay to watch that piece of shit). I can't fall asleep on a plame. but that movie was so horrible, so unbelievably not funny I fell asleep.. twice...

And how do you parlay this potpourri of poorly done SNL skits and shoddy movies. You get a late night show! Possibly the most awkward hour of zero laughs you can see on tv. Try to watch an entire episode, I dare you! I tried. Couldn't make it to the end of the monologue.

If you're thinking "Hey he's the only person who feels this way" Google "Jimmy Fallon is" and see the most looked up questions


Mark Sanchez Ok he's got the trifecta of annoying. 1) He was the QB at USC, I hate USC and I especially hate QB's from USC as they all think they are celebrities and Gods and all that shit 2) He's a cocky fucking loudmouth who the media can't stop gushing over, even though he hasn't done anything to warrant anything 3) He does a Vanity Fair magazine shoot or some shit, starts dating the supermodel he was shooting with, and made himself a papparzzi followee without ever taking a snap. Fuck you, you douchebag!

Me Who do I think I am, sitting in a corner of anonimity bashing a bunch of people I don't know because I probably hate my life and hate that I'm not the people I profess to hate. Also I'm constantly negative, always agitated and hold this nice sence of superiority over "sheeple" because they spend $500 on an IPAD... Fucking idiots spending $500 on a piece of shit that doesn't do anything my cell phone can't do.. See there I go again!

One love...

Ok so it's been 5 months, again since I've posted, but there's a reason and a trend for this. My busiest season is from November until about the end of may. So during the summer I'm not sitting on any deadlines and I have free time at work and not at work so I start thinking which gets be blogging

But during the winter I'm working 13 fucking hours a day plus weekends and I don't have the energy to keep this going

So now that its summer again I'm back with more posts, again probably just venting and complaining about my life and now nothing is ever simple even though that's exactly what I am... Simple..

So what's been happening with me?

- My summer was awful, worst summer of my life. I slowly had my heart crushed by the girl who was my whole life. It left me feeling like Kid Cudi in day and night. Just toss and turn and no sleep. BUT I found an amazing girl part way through though the summer and we connected on the nerdiest level in the world. It was soo chill.

- So in August when I was mentally done with this girl, I went to Australia, single and looking to have so much fun I would forget my problems. and FUCK I did. Man what an amazing country Australia is. Between chillin on the beach in Brisbane, to being a college kid again and going to keggers and playing beer pong. and I'll never ever forget Julie, Yiemi, and my favourite - Becca, the beautiful girl from Marquette

- So in September this girl tells me that things are going to be better... That didn't happen and I was back to being confused and miserable...

- It ended in January and I went on a rampage of drinking, partying, meeting new girls having fun and just being care free

- and then in March she came back into my life, but its different, I'm different, and there's no way anybody is bringing me down again

I'm a new person now, or so I've convinced myself... I'm in my own place, I'm eating healthy, I'm active, I'm social.... I'm chill, just chill

and this looks like it might be the 2nd best summer of my life... Nothing will ever compare to Queens summer... but that's another blog for another day... Oh wait I blogged that summer lol

Merry Christmas, my gingerbread house

So I was going to talk about my future... or lack thereof... but I had 2 really weird dreams. So I decided it was time to do another round of dream therapy

Dream 1

Honestly I don't know if I can interpret these dreams because there's more that happened but I don't remember what it is, but I remember that more happened

I remembering being in a big city at night on a street corner with some friends. There's an office building (or at least I got the feeling there was) behind me, and a long road ahead of me. I think the road is a downhill (actually it looked fun to drive) but I never actually take it. so we are talking about... something... fuck...it was like poker or trading or something. I was holding a brown bag with beer and chips but nobody was drinking. So a car is driving by and it plays this Blink 182 song - Dumpweed. We all air guitar and sing along as it drives away. Then we walk into a tent where people are playing poker and everyone keeps asking me about Tyler (Tyler was this huge jacked dude I went to school with. a buddy and a crazy ladies man)... Then I'm talking to this girl who I'm going to sleep with and she asks me about Tyler. So I tell her then we are about to go for a walk when I wake up...

What does this all mean? nooo idea I guess I should start with the symbols

City - To see a city in your dream, signifies a sense of community and your social environment. If you dream of a big city, then it suggests that you need to develop closer ties and relationships. I don't know if the city was big but I think it was Sydney so I would consider that big. This also makes sense considering I was stood up for a movie + BJ's Sat night and there was a party on last night that I decided not to go to... Maybe I was being scolded by my mind for not being social...

Office building - If the office in your dream is unfamiliar or strange, then it suggest that you are constantly comparing yourself to others. Yes I can see that. I'm very competitive and I do compare myself to other people, but that's what makes me ME...

Night and Tent - To have a dream that takes place at night, represents some major setbacks and obstacles in achieving your goals. There are some issues in your life that you are facing, but are not too clear. Hmmmm I am facing issues on where I want to live, do I still want to go to NYC. There are major obstacles like the economy and my wanting to buy a house. Or maybe NYC is actually an obstacle to me buying a house... shoot this is getting confusing... ok ok more symbols

Alcohol - To dream that you are enjoying alcohol in moderation, denotes contentment and satisfaction in the decisions that you have made. Success is within your grasp Wait, what the fuck? So I'm having setbacks in achieving my goals but success is within my grasp? Fuck I am satisfied with my decisions... hmmm maybe this is making sense after all

Hmmmm ok so what I think my dream is telling me is to be happy with the decisions I've made so far because its leading me down the right path (Alcohol) but at the same time my future goals have roadblocks already in the way (Night & tent). At the same time, one of my roadblocks must be... Wait I think I have it... ONE of my roadblocks to going to NYC must be that I haven't developed a closeness with enough people in Toronto so that when I do come back I will have something to come back to. and I believe this because I'm comparing myself to other people. Sometimes I compare my friend count on facebook to my friends (shut up I'm fucking lame ok leave me alone) and wonder how or why my friends have other circles that they are a part of. But what my dream is telling me is my friends will always be there no matter where I go, so I shouldn't be worried about that. I also should stop comparing my friend amounts...

Wow... fucking insightful, even if I did pull that out of my ass... Did I ever tell you I'm a genius??

Oh I forgot... I don't remember dream 2 anymore... awesome-o

One Love